The Mole - Host

Episode 10

I shall commence by first giving out major/appropriate props, verbal bouquets, a monumental salute and congratulations. That goes to each of our final 3 standing.  As I think about it, a modern day Mod Squad.  Kinda.

First up:  To the victor goes the spoils.  First place... grand prize Mark "Daddy Warbucks."  To you, brotherman, I tip my hat to a spectacular effort and a helleva job.  You, my friend, are the proud owner of  The Moley Grail 2008.  Not to mention that big fat chunk of change you're rollin' home with.  If my math is correct, $420,000.00.  That ain't bad, son.  Congrats.  You played a superior game, with the intensity and the commitment of a highly trained, highly focused athlete.  An effort that must leave your fellow players both awed and proud.  I gotta admit Mark did a solid job of leaving his mark all over this season.  Talk about playing with fire.  Oh, sorry big man, poor choice of words considering that journal inferno thing.  You did cut it crazy close, narrowly side-stepping execution countless times.  It's important to be good in this game.  It's vital to be lucky.

Nicole:  Love her, loathe her... you could not ignore her as she gave us her own unique prescription for entertainment.  It was not her style and definitely not her chosen path in this game to fade out of anybody’s consciousness.  To you, young lady, a healthy congratulations.  You added to our adventure in endless ways.   She of little notetaking and self-professed lack of quiz skills -- wink, cough, wink... your "by any means necessary" approach nearly won the whole damn thing.  Finishing runner-up in this game is impressive.  Doing it based nearly all on sheer memory is nothing short of outstanding.  I know you said all along you weren't in it for the money... you decided you wanted an experience.  I hope through all this you felt the ride was as worthwhile as I – and a long list of fans felt it was.

And last but far from least, my main man, Craig.  I refer to him as my "main man," not because of his stealthy, sabotagey ways.  Yes, I congratulate you, young squire, for keeping so many so off-balance for so long.  That's a pressure cooker role every week that only your past fellow Moles will every fully understand.  You endured the testing of vertigo issues and health issues and not only survived, but you thrived.  Cheers to you.  But the reason I’m now referring to Craig as "my main man" is twofold:  First, for conquering his fear of heights on that bungee effort, which he did with such grace... but ironically nearly busted his ankle trying to step off a 6-inch curb to hug it out and, secondly, for something not shown on camera.  Along w/ a spot-on Chris Farley impersonation doing a strong "down by the river" bit, Craig fancied himself as a finely honed "Mole host" impersonator.  Yes, he occasionally broke out into his version of me.  Very amusing.  I'm not sure it was even close, but in between busting his chops, I did thank him for the effort.  I do appreciate the sincerest form of flattery, C-smooth.  I think.

At the finale, my wish is that everyone -- all of the players and everybody at home could have seen that look of sincere "shock and awe" when Mark’s door finally flew open to officially signify his utopian moment.  My man stood there... motionless, staring at me, mouth wide open in complete disbelief.  Mark told me he was so stunned because, just moments before, he was at the other emotional extreme, accepting that he'd already lost. Coach Mark jumped up at lightening speed and shoved his key in the slot so fast that the system wasn't quite set to release the door's deadbolt.  After a couple more tries, ... the handle turned... leaving our winner standing there -- like a 4 year old on Christmas who just caught a glimpse of Old St. Nick as he bolted back up the chimney.  With that tasty payday, Mark, I'm guessing more than a few people will be calling you Santa this year.

As I get set to sign off my final blog of 2008, I will say it's hard to believe this season is actually over.  I posted in my previous blog my many thanks to all of you who watched – and also dropped a note on the message boards.  The cool, kind and thoughtful words from all of you lighting up the many threads mean a lot.

Cheers to this season... cheers to the entire Mole team for their tireless efforts... Cheers and congrats to all 12 of our dynamic players... and cheers to all of you and your love of this special game.

Thank you.  It’s been nothing short of a blast working as your host.

Stay cool...and stay tuned.

Peace – JK.

Episode 9

Before I get rolling knee deep into this week's episode ... I would like to take a brief moment to let you cats out there in Mole-ville know a few things:

1)   I am Jon Kelley... and I approve this blog. (It's an election year, so figured I'd get in on the act).

2)   Want to sincerely thank all of you for being so damn passionate about our show.  And when I say "our," I mean all of us:  those on the killer production team who busted their tails to put together a high quality show top to bottom AND all of you out there watching the show with fervor and enthusiasm each and every week.

3)   And I gotta give it to all you creative message board jockeys dialing in one of my all-time favorite Mole threads this week:  Camp JonFOMO.   Classic moment in my broadcast career -- I appreciate it rmarzull.  I'm humbled and flattered.  Of course I cannot reveal the accuracy (or inaccuracy) of your out of the box/unorthodox guess, but I can tell you I cracked up looking through it.  And I loved the ingenuity of reasons why I must be The Mole:  "never been a semi-black Mole" (I’ve been called swirl, but that's very funny), the full moon "O" in my name, the John Denver song clue -- Steinbeck -- semi-mouthing my initials to Craig on Swing Out (you went deep emk4226), strong pick up on the Leo DiCaprio reference (yes I am a Leo, Aug 5), Jon rhymes w/ "Con," Kell(e)y green, the freckle under my eye (i.e.  I lie w/my eyes clue), and magen3 letting me know she's "soooo on to" my dirty deeds as the resident saboteur.  Everyone who stepped up and in this one, thanks for the entertainment.  A brother digs it.

Back to the games we play...

So it all comes down to this, huh?  12 players, melted all the way to the final triple threat.  Nicole, Craig and Mark.  Helluva journey.  Big congrats to the last trio standing.  Since it's been a non-stop adventure, the final 2 missions HAD to come strong.

"Tick Tock Boom" was an intricate mission, testing our players craniums, sleuth skills and teamwork.  As it unfolded, everybody looked Moley -- or everybody was truly twisted up and running out of gas.  But like Kobe Bryant dropping that buzzer beating, game winning jumper, stumbling out of bounds and into the stands, Craig hit nothing but the bottom of the net.

Side note:  The leather jacket I sported in the mission was a local product.   Picked it up the day before on Florida St. at a cool shop called "Etiqueta Negra."  Why do I mention this?  If you ever get to Buenos Aires, I highly recommend you grab some leather goods.  In a word:  the Argentine goods are "butter."  And the price is just as smooth.

Ok, so back to the blog --

Not sure if you got the full vibe from the episode but I felt like a xylophone player subbing as an AT&T operator.  While I played musical phones all day, our dynamic trio raced around the city... solving clues, sharing ice cream and snacks, taking photos and visiting historic monuments.  Instead of soaking up the sights with them, I was resigned to juggling calls and enjoying their travels via cell phone snap shots.

Did anybody else notice Nicole getting a little salty with me?  Woman resorted to hanging up the phone in my grill.  She couldn't have blamed me for all the trouble she was having trying to complete her mission.  Luckily, I was in a good mood.  I let it slide.  Either that, or I decided I didn't want to risk not waking up with no physical evidence to explain my sudden condition. Yo, Nicole, you know I'm playin' ... right?

In the end, Mark rolled large, finishing numero uno.  Again.  Clearly my man does not like to finish 2nd.  So after Craig made his way over on his own accord and the cab I sent for Nicole finally got her back safe and sound ... it was the moment of truth:  Look inside the Mole's dossier OR put $75,000 into the pot.  Mark made it clear that he felt any edge was worth the price, so he basically bought a very expensive insurance policy.  No doubt a hefty price to pay, but I don't blame him.  But I'm also a gambler.  I would've gone all or nothing.  Mark maybe didn't consider that potential extra 75K could buy a lot of hair gel.  Maybe he already has an endorsement deal...

So it's in the books.  No more missions.  No more quizzes.  End of a long and winding road full of twists, turns, highs, lows, laughs, tears, possibly televisions first ever "drive-by fruiting" (I can't take credit, lifted it off the message boards), free flowing pisco sours and wine... and of course eternal good vibrations.

It's been my pleasure to be your host for season 5 of this phenomenal show. 

I sincerely appreciate you welcoming me in to your tight knit crew.  Saying I had a blast would be a bold understatement.  I loved every step of the way.  Bar none the most unique and dynamic experience I've had in this wonderful world of broadcasting.  It's my sincere hope you enjoyed watching this ride... as much as I did being a part of it.

All that's left to do is answer one question:  "Who … is The Mole?"

Episode 8

Shocked?

Don't be shy.  Raise your hand if you were at least a little thrown off  watching Paul getting red-thumbed and full bucket of cold water tossed on  his "scorched earth" game-plan.  Can't call his execution earth shattering -- w/ only 4 players remaining, everybody is vulnerable in a large way.  Except, of course, the dastardly individual who rocks that mysterious, 1-name moniker:  Mole.

Love him... hate him... disagree with his lack of tact or consideration.  You can't argue Paul played an effective game.  The cat made it clear from day 1; his approach was full-throttle WWE Smackdown.  Mental and verbal "shock and awe."  He announced his abrasive approach was purely in the spirit of the game, although he admitted to me, what we saw on the show was mild compared to what his close friends have witnessed back home.  Damn.

Paul told me straight up the game was "too easy."  Meaning not only did he have his target in his sights from the moment the curtain raised on episode one but he was able to rattle players with little effort.   He's a poker player.  Reading people and keeping them off balance are skills and art forms one must master on some level to be effective.  Clearly something was working.  But unfortunately for him, his lovely little daughter and wife, he felt the deck was stacked against him heading into the quiz.   The look on his face when Mark earned the final exemption said it all.  That New York state of mind ultimately wasn't enough to avoid execution this week.  Did he have a last second change of heart, which ultimately proved fatal?  Was he off base on his suspect and merely got lucky every week?  Or did he truly have The Mole stone cold nailed and just got beat on time in the quiz?

To the missions ... a pair of entertaining rides this episode.  "How's the View" was a multi-dimensional mind fry.  Half our final 4 got to channel their inner toddler while the other 2 had an impromptu audition to run camera for a major network show.  Just a long shot here, but my guess is neither Mark or Nicole has a future shooting for ABC.  But truth be told, this mission was ripe for "Moley" behavior.  Acting like you can't work a little camera... acting like you can't kick a soccer ball straight or pour tea into a cup.  Although I will give it to Paul and Craig, that reverse/backwards/inverted goggle view is a serious brain trip.  But I can tell you I'm wearing one right now AND working the camera myself AND typing this blog with only one hand.  No sweat.

I did dig hearing their reactions once they saw their final task in "How's the View."  Paul and Craig's knees were banging almost as loud as jumping off that bridge a couple of weeks ago.

Man, "Cell Out" was killer.  Great mission.  Huge stakes on the line.  The wild part was -- it took longer to explain the game than it did for Mark to solve that doublet.  Seriously.  His paper came flying out of his cell so fast I thought he maybe accidentally kicked it out.  But Mark was on it at lighting speed... leaving me wondering if he was just that good and his game was that tight and motivated to win -- or was this an "inside job" if you catch my drift?

Paul was the self appointed ringleader forming their plan to avoid getting  tagged by paint balls.  It was his idea for him, Nicole and Craig to work together as a team and use distraction tactics to try and keep that final exemption out of Mark's hands.  I'm a huge movie fan... love old flicks.  So I  couldn't help laughing when Paul started chanting in a high pitched voice,  channeling the 70's cult classic "The Warriors."  Brilliant tactic, my man.  Ultimately, only worked to get Paul safely to the finish, but at least he was able to deliver some added entertainment value on his last hurrah.

Congratulations to Paul to making the final quartet.  A game well played.  Thanks for a season full of amusement and adventure.  If you and your cute little girl haven't opened up a lemonade stand yet this summer, I suggest you get crackin, son.

As for this season's last 3 standing... a true "Triple Threat."  Cheers to a phenomenal effort! We're now left with only 2 gunning for the big dollars at stake in this quest for The Moley Grail.

Note to our resident saboteur:  outstanding work.  But the end is near and your time is running out.

Episode 7

This week, we bid farewell to our strong willed attorney, Clay.  On the  downside, the Philly barrister gave a Rocky Balboa-like effort in the game,  only to get ko'ed by The Mole in the late rounds.  At least his flight home  was made a little sweeter with his lovely wife Kim by his side.  More good news: no lemons on board his flight.

"Go Figure" was a high quality cerebral exercise.  Not to mention the ample  opportunities for The Mole to jack things up for everybody.  I sensed a  definite change in tone from our competitors -- can't blame em.  Those  surviving this week knew they were in the final four. Nothing too extreme, but there was an edge... a distinct focus, if you will, which I could feel as  they interacted.

It was really interesting how this one panned out.  Maybe I was starting to  zone in as well, but I think I could definitely decipher who was on the up  and up... and who was being Moley.  But of course I'm not letting you guys in  on any of the stuff bouncing around up in my melon.  I have no desire to  disturb your groove as you track you game.  Just like all of you, I STILL  don't know who The Mole is ... but at this point, I felt like I had it nailed.  Of course, it wouldn't be the first time I thought I had it on lockdown  --  and was flat out wrong.

Then it was on to the next mission where it was time to go underground.   Look, it's no secret that it's my job/extreme pleasure to be the show's  "puppet master"...the diabolical host who twists players' minds and tosses  out major league curveballs.  But for "Ticket to Ride," I was well aware how badly the players wanted ... NEEDED to have some up close and personal contact  with their loved ones.  Sometimes I'm a big softie and honestly, I had no desire to do anything but pray each and every one of them was successful.

Let me break it down like this:  those cats were so wound up after hearing  about the mission, if they DIDN'T get a passing grade at that train station,  it would not have been pretty.  To be that close... only for Mark to see his  pregnant wife roll away and Paul missing a chance to hug his wife and sweet  little daughter ... man, I don't even like thinking about it.

Fortunately, we had a fairytale ending and I could feel all the good  vibrations flowing once again. For one day, I put my Mr. Grinch approach on  hold, and got caught up in the lovefest.  But trust me, it's only temporary!

Now, I could go on and on but you've got more important business to tend to:   uncovering that real-life rogue, known simply as The Mole.  Happy hunting.

Episode 6

Alright Mole-a-holics... you can breathe a little easier now.  I know that our off week left you guys seriously jonesing.  I understand.  I feel your pain.  But the world is right again.  By now you've had a chance to inhale Monday's double dip treat: back-to-back Mole rolls... 2 consecutive hours to get your fix on ABC.  How'd you dig that recap? Of course, I was in South America every step of the way but I have to admit, the first 5 "flashback" was killer and got me seriously juiced up for our final 5.

You may have noticed my beverage of choice has slightly shifted.  Gone are the delicious and habit forming pisco sours. It's now all about the grapes. Finely harvested Malbec grapes -- aka the "rock star grapes" of S. America.  What do you expect?  Our Grapes of Cache mission had me knee deep in 'em.  My mother is probably wondering how I functioned w/ a wine glass in my hand 70-percent of the time on the show.  But she's happy I'm at least getting my daily fruit intake. Right, mom? 

Nothing short of a banner day for our 6-pack:  Their brains were crankin' full steam ahead... Mark perfectly cast as "running man"... Craig proving he's no scarecrow nailing brain-teasers... Nicole and Paul managed to keep their sniping at a minimum and Alex and Clay got in a decent cardio workout as well.  No runs... no errors... completely neutralizing The Mole and running the table for a perfect score of $70K in the pot.  In one sunny afternoon at the vineyard, all was right in their world.  I can tell you I do appreciate a good cerebral workout.  Did the players rise so high that our resident saboteur couldn’t keep pace?  Or did The Mole consciously lay low to throw everybody off his or her trail? 

Next up... "Swing Out."  A tailor made mission for me to unleash my inner masochist.  Did I like messing with their minds -- and bodies? Absolutely not.  Like is a bold understatement... doesn't begin to describe how much of a blast it was.  One by one I got to leave them hanging about 100 feet above ground, wishing I would stuff a sock in my mouth and shut the hell up.  Instead, it was my duty to torture them.  What I savored the most was how they were trying to simultaneously avoid fainting while ignoring the words coming out of my mouth.  That is until I said the magic one: exemption.  Watching that moment of clarity snap into their consciousness -- like a bolt of lightning tossed by Zeus from Mt. Olympus -- as I uttered, "Eeeee-xeeeeempt-iooooon" was, in a twisted way, pure pleasure.  Aside from sheer terror -- the biggest mind blow was realizing that jumping was the easy part.

I should know.  I took the plunge exactly as the players did... except my knees weren't shaking like my Grandma's or Alex's.  Actually I believe my grandmother would've been more stable.  Alex didn't really jump, he sort of "collapsed" off the plank. 

My quick take on the other 5 jumpers:

-Craig. Big time proud of him. Vertigo, hyperventilating and questions about whether the plank could actually hold him? So what. Craig manned up and rocked it.

-Paul.  Let's just say his NY swagger had less bounce and bravado than normal.  But no way he lets his little daughter down at home.  He wanted to make up for coming up empty in "Over the Falls."

-Mark.  He'd been begging for a thrill ride. Knew he was up for it.

-Clay.  Let’s just say our resident counselor didn’t appreciate my "cross examination."

-Nicole.  The way she was holding the bridge rail, gingerly walking over, I couldn't tell if she was putting on a show or scared.  She may have had the most style points of all the free fallers.

In the end, Alex was literally the one falling from grace as our illusive saboteur wrecked his quest for the Moley Grail.

Large credit to The Mole this week.  Gotta give it to you... you're a very shady and shifty one.  I can see you ain't gonna make this easy.

Episode 5

This week's execution was one of those "good news/bad news" deals for our fair Kristen.  The upside?  She made it out of Moleville virtually unscathed:  no ambulance rides, no hypothermia and no fruit projectile that smacked her upside her blonde melon.  On the down side, The Mole kicked her athletic and cerebral junk to the curb.  This took a lot of you by surprise:  watching your top suspect roll off in the Grim Reaper mobile.  For all, a finish to what turned out to be nothing short of a one-of-a-kind, if not legendary, episode in this show's history.  You ever heard of a mass, unified player revolt against one of their own?  Exactly.

And that was just part of this week's Mole Madness. 

It started out with "All for One."  The players found themselves literally linked together in what looked like a deleted scene on the "Escape from Alcatraz" DVD.  If you thought all those burning barrels were simply for cool effect and aesthetics, don't kid yourself.  Frigid temps had everybody freezing their Andes off.

Mark was the last player standing in the cold.  On most nights, I would've bet big dollars he would've been a lock, wasting no time unlocking himself, ignoring the exemption and bouncing over to join us for a fireside chat.  But after watching his wheels fall off during "Burn Journal Burn," I'd seen a major shift in his attitude.  Gone was the team player, high-strung coach and type-A personality.  Mark had seemingly sunk into a personal abyss, displaying a much darker persona.  Ultimately, he chose to put money in the pot but I know giving up that free ticket to the next round was a HUGE struggle for him.

You've heard the expression, "When life gives you lemons, make lemonade?"  Well, apparently this show's creed has morphed into, "When life serves you a lemonhead ... DUCK!"

For a few minutes inside one of the show's vans, aka "the love machine," "The Lawyer" vs. "The Yonker" had a pay-per-view grudge match.  A Mendoza Citrus Smackdown.  Somebody hand me a strong lemon pisco sour, please.

Might be a mismatch in size.  Clay has him in height, weight and reach but Paul seems fairly scrappy.  I figure Paul'd be one of those cats not shy about jumping outside the ropes, into the screaming crowd for a metal folding chair, and then whacking anybody who got in his way right in the mug with it.  Unfortunately for Don King, this headbanger's ball never quite lived up to its much anticipated pre-fruit hype.   No ejection, and through it all, everyone seemed to overlook the condition of the individual most at risk:  lemonhead.

We go from Pulp Fiction, to a full-blown, no holds barred, "Mole Revolution."

Travelers final tally:  Zero dinero.  Strangely enough, they all seemed kind of proud they chose not to attempt the mission.  Correct me if I'm wrong here, but the players pulling the rip cord on the mission didn't burn anybody except themselves.  Did they make a statement?  Absolutely.  They proved by not even trying one step of the mission, they'd never know what offers I had up my sleeve.   They did however add a big fat $0 grand to the pot.  Congrats. 

Looks like the newly formed "Zero Heroes" were so blind with resistance and pride, they bought fully into the campaign to toss in the towel ... ultimately playing right into The Mole's dirty hands.  Did I say congrats?

Episode 4

OK.  Things are starting to heat up and get down to some serious business.  Translation:  Victoria getting bounced left a bunch of you running back to the thumbprint drawing board.

Yeah, you know who you are.  Those in the Victoria camp were stone cold sure they had the game and The Mole pegged.  Well, don't sweat it.  Every time this ride seems too easy or predictable, reality bites.  Hard.  Those of you who had young Victoria locked in your sights -- you're not alone.  Clearly, she was way off the trail as well.

I will tell you that Midas Rush was a rush... both figuratively and literally.  Like a dope, I forgot to wear any headgear.   Knew I was in for a chilly ride when I noticed our crew members decked out like South American Sasquatch.  So while I took in the mind-blowing sights of the Andes (and simultaneously fighting off a touch of frostbite on my earlobes), I made sure to heed my own advice as I pounded the H2O.  Since it was my first time at the altitude, it didn't take long for the dizzy vibe to creep into effect.

The drama reached a crescendo when Craig was carted off, sirens blazing and oxygen pumping full force.  Rough moments as the ambulance rolled away...nobody was sure how serious his condition truly was.  Fortunately we keep medical staff close at hand and they were right on top of the situation.  Craig looked winded on top the mountain...but we all were, so I didn't see his collapse coming.  We were all relieved when we got the update that his prognosis was solid.  R&R... chilling in the hotel... and he would soon be back.

Just curious...anybody else notice Mark was a little salty... i.e. not a real big fan of mine during "Burn Journal Burn"?  Maybe I'm over-thinking it, but man our boy was p*#$$ed off.  It was one of those situations I kinda saw coming.  Let's face it, his journal was his lifeline.  I was starting to think he was authoring the kind of read Oprah might dig for her book club.  So, I was bracing for all hell to break loose.  And then -- the moment of truth.

As I unleashed my inner pyromaniac, I ignited the stack of journals AND Mark's inner rage.  I was kind of hoping he'd be the one to volunteer his ... nope.  Once the flames started licking around his journal, I fully expected Mark to bolt and dive into the burning stack.  At the same time, I was mentally diagramming my best path to sack him like Tom Brady rolling out at this year's Super Bowl . Instead, he just stood painfully still with his jaw clenched.  Then he went AWOL.  What you saw on TV was the Cliff's Notes version.

Look, I get it ... Mark is an emotional cat.  He was seriously upset.  He'd written a lot in that journal and had to watch it go up in smoke.   But here's the deal:  Players are told the journals are to be used for the game.  And everything is fair game.  Despite my man having fury in his eyes aimed straight at me, Mark knew deep down it was nothing personal.  At least he eventually figured it out.  Nothing in the game from our side is mean spirited.  Oh, we make sure to bust their chops from time to time... and dish out some high quality degradation -- all for your viewing enjoyment.  But nothing but love and no ill will attached.  The way I see it, a burned journal is a small price to pay for a serious crack at up to a half million bucks.  You dig?

Time for me to bounce.  I've done enough damage for the week.  Keep on keeping on ... you can't hide forever Mole!

Episode 3

Hey Mole bloggers,

Before I jump into this week's episode, wanted to drop a few impressions of S. America, specifically Santiago.  It's the capital of Chile and definitely has a big city feel:  picturesque views, lots of energy, lots of traffic and on many days, a fair amount of smog.  Yeah, kind of reminded me of  Los Angeles.  People in Santiago also enjoy sharing the good vibrations.  Translation:  lots of PDA on the streets.

Speaking of sharing the love and good vibrations...didn't take long to figure out Nicole and Paul wouldn't be hugging it out anytime soon.  Funny thing is, it goes in waves.  Sometimes they're like the brother and sister who can't help but fight all the time.  Other times, they were actually cordial ... ok, cordial w/ an underlying tension.   Paul admitted to me he found it odd that Nicole was actually civil to players when the cameras were off, but her inner diva dominated whenever the cameras were rolling.  That clearly irritated him because he didn't believe she was for real.

I will tell you there were a few dinners where I wanted to make sure I kept all the knives and forks off the table.  At times, it made sense for the game.  Other times, I had to step in and chill them out.  Oddly enough, both players were constantly emphasizing, "It's just a game", "part of their game plan" and "I'm here to win, nothing personal."  But in spite of all that talk, the truth was you could tell it really DID bother both Nicole and Paul at times.  Which ultimately led to a few infamous quotes from the self proclaimed Dr. Diva:

1)   "I’ll kill you in your sleep."
2)   "I won’t leave any DNA."
3)   "You’ll wake up dead." 

Okaaaaaaay.    Sometimes, it felt like a game of "Snaps" or "Yo Mamma."  The only question that really mattered -- would it help either of them win the game or was one of them actually The Mole? 

Back to our missions.  "Fruit of the Luge" not only had a nice ring to it, but this adventure also revealed much Moley activity.   $24,000 painful dollars were lost from the pot and the players were bummed ... big time. 

"Dress Code" was an adventure.  And not just the various physiques on display.  I quickly found out our group was even more diverse than I could have imagined.  It's become a running joke that whenever I walk into a room, all the players would say in unison, "Ahhhh, bleep, here’s Jon.  What's next?  What’s the twist?"  I could sense the little obscenities were wrapped w/ love and from the heart ... most of the time, anyway.  I did take pleasure in giving them spa day to relax and unwind.   Even more therapeutic?  Hijacking their wardrobes.

Interesting how Clay and Mark both bowed out.  The players needed to seriously jump start their cash flow, but apparently neither Clay nor Mark could put a price tag on their pride.  Both were already on camera in their shorts, topless in front of the entire nation.  Both had explanations tied to dignity and embarrassment.   Hell, the way Mark’s robe flew off immediately after I explained what was up, I thought he might be laying groundwork for a layout in Playgirl.  Very strange indeed...

From what I read on this site, you guys have some serious theories on our Mole's identity.  From clothes, to clues, to actions and lack thereof, I’ve been blown away by your meticulous and detailed quest for the game's "Moley Grail."  I wish you well. 

One of my favorite conspiracy theories thus far -- while it had little to do w/ the game, was clever, unique and very imaginative.   Here on the ABC message board, somebody went deep, passing along the following nugget.  Went something like this:  "I think on the final episode, Jon Kelley will reach up and rip off his face -- ala Mission Impossible III, revealing all along, he was actually Anderson Cooper!"

Love it.  Keep it coming. We're just getting warmed up...

Episode 2

Number 2 on The Mole's hit list:  Liz.  Our sweet, self proclaimed "little old lady."  May she rest in TV land peace. 

No doubt Liz will be missed... by players and yours truly.  She never stopped smiling, had non-stop energy and could crack a joke -- using a mouth more suited for a sailor -- that would leave the room both laughing AND in shock.

Liz was so sweet as I walked her to our dreaded "Execution Mobile."  She gave me a sincere hug, flirted and made me promise to sign her ceramic pig when we shoot the finale.  Based on her off-the- wall humor, that request coming from her, sounds borderline R-rated now that I see it in print. 

Let's rap about the missions.  Race to the Summit.  Set up w/ the gorgeous "Parque Metropolitano" in the heart of Santiago as a breathtaking backdrop.  And the soccer match?  Well, the Chilean minis used our players up, delivering the kind of merciless and ugly beat down a Mole would truly love. That made for brilliant television. 

As for Kristen and Mark, the dynamic duo was flying up the incline so fast, I barely had time to fly up the hill and get out in front of them so I could have my offers waiting.  No joke.  Mark didn't want any part of me offering to make their job easier, in fact, I almost had to literally grab him to make him stop.  Kristen did chill at one point, to enjoy one of my homemade pisco sours.

What'd you all think about those flying ceramic pigs?  I like to refer to them as "aerodynamic swine."  Talk about a creative way to weave the fabric of Pomaire, Chile into the mix.  "When Pigs Fly" had many components:  teamwork, racing around, confusion, language barriers, riot gear and a helluva riot to pull off.  Fortunately for you at home, "smell-a-vision" has yet to be invented.  Those cute little pigs chilling around our launch pad... let's just say they were extremely generous and not shy about treating our players to loads of pungent land mines to dance around.  Then, of course, you had Bobby using the wheelbarrow as his personal la-z-boy.

2 shows... 2 lovely ladies bite the dust. 10 left standing and in the hunt for "The Moley Grail.".  I just made that up... nice ring to it.  Won't be the last time I roll that phrase out.  Feel free to use it, my blogging comrades.

Before I get out of here, a couple of inquiries from Mole bloggers.  Apparently more than a few of you are somewhat intrigued by seeing me "walk on water" during the promos/first mission.  Look, you know a magician can't reveal his tricks.  But good news for you:  I ain't David Blaine or Harry Houdini.  I just kinda played an illusionist on TV.  How did I do it?  I will tell you it's real.  No computer generated stuff.  I was truly out there.  Let's just say we had the best in the business, Bungee.com, hooking up our safety rigs.  Nice effect. Worth the effort ... despite ruining a killer pair of new John Varvatos boots.

Keep the questions coming.  Until we blog again...

Episode 1- Recap

By now you've all had a chance to take in episode 1 of The Mole's rebirth.  I loved every minute of it. 

Why wouldn't I? I had the pleasure of saying hello to our 12 players and then sending them over a spectacular 100-foot waterfall. They did alright for rookies.  What you couldn't see was how crazy cold it was and how the mist off the waterfall made us swear it was on the verge of turning to snow.  Along with the brawn, we of course tested the players' brains in the Crusoe mission.

No doubt:  this was a completely different gig than anything I'd had before.  The added bonus was -- just like the players -- I was challenged every step of the way.  Taking it all in, making adjustments on the fly, feeling my way through the early missions ... I was energized because I was evolving and forced to produce a different kind of television than I was used to... The Mole way.  Episode 1 had me all juiced up for 2, 3, 4 and beyond because I could feel I was starting to find a rhythm and a flow in a whole new game.  For me personally, this made the ride even more fulfilling.

Sweet Marcie was the first to feel The Mole's wrath being sent off in the Black Execution mobile (that became my official title for our SUV). It's too bad ... would've liked to see her stick around to enjoy the ride.  What you didn't see behind the scenes was how the very first execution really went down.  New technology.  So new, in fact, we didn't really get a test run... so you know what that means...technical problems.  Every so often, the screen would freeze mid-frame -- which had the players frozen at the edge of their seats.  It definitely helped amp the tension.

Add that to a local dog who, almost on cue, would manage to wander into the shot every time we started rolling cameras.  And once we got Fido out of the picture, 3 dudes fresh out of a nightclub, cross-eyed drunk strolled into our set in the middle of shooting, asking for cigarettes. Our drama-filled execution was becoming more comical by the second. We told them no -- about 5 times, I believe they cussed at us in Spanish and finally rolled out. It's a little after 4 a.m. at this point, so we are racing to beat the sun coming up.  Daytime execution just doesn't have the same effect.

After the intoxicated, nicotine craving triple threat was done, we learned that 4:15 a.m. must be trash pick-up time in the city.  You know that loud "beep beep" you hear when big trucks back up? That's what started ripping through the air as we tried to wrap.  The players didn't know whether to laugh or cry at this point.  But we managed to chill the sanitation engineers for a minute, and finally finished up just before the sun poked up over the horizon. Crazy stuff.  Couldn't make this up if I tried.

Before I wrap .... wanna say I appreciate everyone dropping in to my blog to say what's up.  Gotta to send a quick hello to Jill S. who stopped in to leave me a sweet note after my first entry.  Great to hear from you... put a giant smile on my face to hear you are watching.  Tell your mom I said hello, and let Steve know we definitely need to hook up for a poker night over the holidays.  He's very generous at cards ... I dig cleaning out all his chips. 

One of the perks of hosting The Mole and doing this blog is I get to reconnect w/cool people like my girl Jill S. who I haven't seen for years.  I appreciate all the killer feedback I've been getting ... looking forward to hanging w/ you all Mole season long.

Episode 1 was a blast and the stakes keep getting higher and higher.  Blog to you soon.