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GREY'S ANATOMY - What the elavator sees

Well, they covered a lot of ground this week on Grey's.  I feel like they're working up to a huge end of the season payoff - at least I hope that's what they're doing, because there are a lot of storylines that need wrapping up.  Let's review, shall we?

Ava/Rebecca returns again this week with her phantom pregnancy and strange behavior.  Izzie informs her that she's not pregnant, but Ava doesn't believe her because she's totally ape poo crazy.  This week Izzie just comes out and tells Alex that Ava's not pregnant, even though last week she was acting all professional and wanted to keep that info confidential.  Am I wrong, or did Izzie just do a complete flip-flop on the whole medical ethics thing?

Cristina is still in her "dark place" after receiving news of Burke's success last week.  She totally rips into Lexie (who to her credit does not cry) in a way that's cruel even for Cristina, and she even cleans her apartment.  Yes.  Cleaning.

Meredith is still struggling with therapy this week and is apparently struggling with doctor-patient protocol, because she barges in on her therapist without an appointment and follows her into the bathroom to unload some emotional baggage.  If I were a therapist, I would draw the line at impromptu sessions in the lavatory.  It's like, I'm sorry about your issues with your mother, but I'm trying to do my business here.

The Derek and Meredith relationship seems to have stalled out this week.  They continue working together on the World's Deadliest Clinical Trial - seriously, their track record sucks - and there's definitely some romantic tension between the two, but this time Derek seems to be the one getting in the way of a Mer/Der coupling.  If he's so conflicted about the situation and feels guilty (presumably)  for dating Rose while he's in love with Mer, there's an easy solution:  stop dating Rose. 

I don't hate Rose as a character, and this week's episode made me feel kind of bad for her.  Derek's heart isn't in their relationship - he keeps blowing her off, he didn't call her after they had sex, he makes goo goo eyes at Meredith.  If I were Rose, I'd say, "Listen, I know I'm just a supporting character, but I deserve to be treated with respect."  And then I'd dump him and hook up with Sloan.  Hey, at least a relationship with Sloan has a level of honesty to it.

Speaking of Sloan, I''m enjoying watching his attempts at chaste behavior after being called a whore in front of the entire nursing staff last week.  He fends off all of Callie's requests for illicit workplace sex, but is preoccupied all day by the idea of a Sloan/Callie/Hahn threesome.  When Hahn teasingly plants a kiss on Callie in the elevator, it's too much for the guy and he drags Callie off to a coat closet to get busy.  Well, he almost made it a whole day.

Callie's reaction to getting kissed in the elevator was telling - she seemed shocked and confused but not entirely displeased.  I think her friendship with Hahn has awakened some unexamined Sapphic urges in Callie and she's going to declare her lesbianhood on the season finale.  Just throwing that out there.

Man, a lot goes on in that one elevator, huh?   It could write a book.

--Dave Campbell

GREY'S ANATOMY - Professional complications

The personal and the professional collided and smooshed together this week on Grey’s, with entertaining results. 

Meredith and Derek inched closer to becoming MerDer again.  Meredith stopped denying her feelings for Derek to her therapist. Derek finally slept with Rose (mercifully, off camera) but admitted to Sloan that he was thinking of Meredith the whole time and feels like a heel.  Actually, “whore” was the word he used.  Mer and Der shared the world’s most romantic tumor surgery, working in perfect sync with soft lights and uninterrupted eye contact.  All that was missing was a little Sade in the background – “Love is Stronger Than Pride” would have been an appropriate choice.

In other developments Izzie has discovered that Ava/Rebecca isn’t pregnant, but professional ethics forbid her from telling Alex, who was getting his head around the whole parenthood idea.  Whaaat?  Seriously, after all the unprofessional stuff Izzie has done, she picked now to suddenly get all ethical and withhold life-changing info from Karev?  Couldn’t she just leave an anonymous Post-It note saying “CRAZY GIRL NOT PREGNANT” in his locker or something?

My favorite storyline was the date-and-tell policy Seattle Grace implemented after the nurses revolt against Mark Sloan’s libido.  Sloan tried without success all episode to get somebody trustworthy to speak to the nurses on his behalf and tell them what a good guy he really is.  Bailey finally agreed to speak to them, but… well, be careful what you wish for.

The quote of the show has to go to Bailey, who addressed the assembled nurses about Sloan while Mark stood smugly by.  She said, in short:  “I would like to offer my thoughts on Dr. Sloan.  This man is a whore.  Has always been a whore, and will probably always be a whore… He’s nasty.”

Bailey shooed all the nurses back to work after admonishing them to keep their knees together, and the normally suave Sloan is left shaken and stirred.  It was a perfect comeuppance.  Sure, you can carry on like a horny frat boy on Spring Break, but you run the risk of being shunned and publicly humiliated.

Such are the risks one takes when mixing the professional and personal. 

--Dave Campbell

GREY'S ANATOMY - Return of the Queen

Addison returned, if only for a week, to Seattle Grace this week to perform a surgery and remind viewers how awesome she is.  Seriously, I’d sort of forgotten what an integral part of the cast Addison was and how hard it’s been to fill the void left in her absence.  I’m glad she’s on Private Practice and all, but I do miss her strutting around the halls of Seattle Grace.  And her dark hair color looks fabulous.

She mistakenly believes that nothing has changed at the hospital since she left, but Addison quickly gets up to speed with the latest break-ups and shake ups.  The scene in the operating room where she asks who Derek’s “McRebound” is while she’s standing right next to Rose was priceless.  Although Rose’s line:  “Six dates, heavy petting, lots of tongue” was just... icky.  What adult talks like that? 

Let's see, who else did Addison catch up with? Addison’s scene with Bailey was touching and really well done – you gotta feel for Bailey in this situation.  I also like Addison’s lunchtime chat with Callie when she asks her if she and Hahn are romantically involved.  Callie’s overly vigorous denial seemed a little suspicious, no?  Methinks Callie doth protest too much.  Oh, and the scene at the end of the episode where Derek shares the elevator with Addison, Mer, and Rose was hilarious.  Mark’s reaction when he saw all the women in Derek’s life piled into one elevator was priceless. 

The whole Addison thing made me wonder:  doesn’t the woman own a phone?  She doesn’t keep in touch with Bailey or Chief anymore?  It’s as if she cut them out of her life when she moved to L.A.  You’d think she’d get an email from one of her former colleagues once in a while at least.

In other developments, Bear Attack Guy and his insecure bride were back for another episode, this time as the first subject for Meredith and Derek’s clinical research test.  Things don’t work out very well for this particular Patient of the Week – meaning he totally dies.

Ava/Rebecca also returns this week with some unexpected and unwelcome news for Alex – she’s pregnant.  Or is she?   

See, this is where I got a little mixed up.  At the end of the episode, Izzie gets some lab work back and is told that her patient is not pregnant.  There were two pregnant women in this episode, the HIV+ gal and Ava/Rebecca.  Is it possible that the lab guy was referring to the HIV+ gal and not Ava/Rebecca?  Why would Ava/Rebecca show up at a hospital for a blood test if she was faking her pregnancy?  I mean, we know she’s a little bit mental, but if she’s trying to trap Alex into a relationship she’s not being very smart about it.  On the other hand, they cut straight to Alex tenderly touching Ava/Rebecca’s belly, so perhaps I’m over-thinking this one.  Maybe Ava/Rebecca is just that crazy.

If anybody can help me out on this one, I’d appreciate it.  I’m a little dense sometimes, but it just didn’t add up.  Despite my confusion, this was another strong episode of Grey’s.  If they could just figure out some way to split Addison between this show and Private Practice, I’d be a happy little camper.

--Dave Campbell

GREY'S ANATOMY - Welcome (back) to the jungle

I must remember to tread carefully while writing this post, because the last time I talked about Grey’s Anatomy and made some offhand comment that Derek and Rose made a cute couple I got chewed out big time by Grey’s fans.  Fair enough.

Apparently they’re not the only people who aren’t enamored with Derek and Rose, because on this week’s all-new Grey’s Anatomy, the staff of Seattle Grace doesn’t have kind words about Rose either.  Mark Sloan tells Derek point blank that he doesn’t like Rose, and Cristina describes her as “vile.”  If the promos are any indication, next week Addison returns to Seattle Grace and she doesn’t approve of the Derek and Rose coupling either.  So yeah – as a couple they are totally doomed.

This week’s brand new episode takes place six weeks in the future from the last new episode, “Crash Into Me” aka The Seth Green Exploding Artery Episode.  Meredith is now in therapy, but she’s failed to grasp the whole concept of talking to your therapist, which is key.  Derek and Rose are a couple now, but haven’t consummated their relationship yet because…?  I don’t know why, because Rose is weird? Who in their right mind would date Derek Shepherd and not sleep with the guy?  What a waste.  Moving on – Lexie and George are sharing a roach infested apartment.  The residents are competing in a surgical contest to see who can rack up the most points, which leads to a lot of sleep deprivation and unnecessary medical procedures.

I have to give credit to the writing staff on the show – they consistently and deftly blend medical storylines with character-motivated relationship drama and irreverent humor, and they occasionally throw in some gross stuff like intestinal spillage and big flaps of scalp hanging loose.  You gotta love that stuff.  One of the things that impresses me is that they always build their episodes around a central, unifying theme. 

This week’s episode, “Where the Wild Things Are” was all about animal behavior and the human ability to evolve.  Nicely bookended by Meredith’s narration, this episode was absolutely packed with references to animals, but they didn’t hit you over the head with it. 

I kept a little running tally of animal symbolism or references because, really, I have nothing better to do:

-          George smashes cockroaches in his new apartment.

-          Shots of fish in the psychiatrist’s office.

-          Izzie chopped off her hair so she could be sleek like a cheetah!

-          Mark asks Derek about Rose:  “What do you see in her?  Is she an animal?  Is she a bobcat?”

-          Chief describes the contest several times as a “lion fight.”

-          The trauma-of-the-week are victims of a bear attack.

-          The phrase “Dog eat dog” is used to describe the competitive environment at Seattle Grace.

-          Izzie asks guest star Cheech Marin about tick or mosquito bites.

-          George says:  “When you hear hoofbeats, thinks horses, not zebras.”

-          Izzie tells George: “I’m in the danger of going extinct here…”

-          Chief describes Alex as an underdog.

-          Chief:  “You were in a lion fight, Stevens.  Just because you didn’t win doesn’t mean you don’t know how to roar.”

-          Lexie tells George:   “I’m a nester, I’m nesting.”

I left out Mer’s voice-over about primordial ooze and animal instincts and evolving, but you get the picture.  The whole episode was chock-full of animal references.

Next week:  Addison comes back for a guest spot (did she color her hair?), Meredith and Derek launch their clinical trial and must work closely together, and psycho Ava/Rebecca returns with a bombshell for Alex – the nine-month kind of bombshell.

Bedside manner prize of the week goes to Mer, who tests a patient's eyesight and shouts triumphantly "TUMOR!"  That's worth 80 points in their competition, so she's psyched.  I'm not sure Brain Tumor Guy shares her enthusiasm.

Quote of the week goes to Izzie, who says:  “I don’t need guys.  I don’t need sex.  Because this competition is my orgasm.”

--Dave Campbell

Grey's Anatomy - Return to glory

Grey's returns on April 24th with a whole mess of all-new episodes, and not a moment too soon.  If you're like me, you have questions and concerns that need to be addressed, stat!

Some thoughts:

• Bailey's going to end up having to operate on her husband, isn't she?  Then we'll see how grumpy he is about having a world-class surgeon for a wife.
• Am I like, the only person on Earth who think that Derek and Rose would make a cute couple?  Sure, their kiss was a little awkward (and indiscrete) but Derek isn't in the wrong here.  He told Meredith that he'd wait - but not forever.  Maybe seeing them together will finally snap Mer out of it and she'll realize she wants to be with McDreamy 24 x 7.
• So George and Izzie are history, right?  It sure looks that way.  Man, all that heartache and drama for nothing.
• Lexie's turning into a more well-rounded and interesting character.  She went through the rite of passage that all Seattle Grace doctors go through - getting too attached to a patient and then watching their artery explode.  Well, maybe they don't all specifically endure artery geysers, but you know what I mean.  I expect that Lexie will be a little more weary and wise going forward.
• Meredith, Meredith, Meredith...  She needs a good therapist to get over her family issues and to clarify what she wants in life.
• Is there a Mark/Hahn coupling in the works?  I don't know, she doesn't seem like his type.  Wait a second, what am I saying?  Hahn's got a pulse and two X chromosomes - of course she's his type!
• Is Ava/Rebecca going to turn into a scary stalker?  That's where I see this heading.  Alex needs to wake up - she's damaged goods.  He should hang out with Lexie, they make a cute couple.

So many questions...  Just a few short weeks until we get some answers.  I am PSYCHED!

--Dave Campbell

GREY'S ANATOMY - The Seattle Grace Work Ethic

This week's Grey's Anatomy, "Haunt You Every Day," was their Halloween episode and since this is February, I put two and two together and figured out that it was a re-run.  I’m bright like that.  Plus, Google was a big help.   Hey, I can't be an expert on every ABC show.  Yet, anyway.

Anyway, I had not seen it previously, so it was new to me and therefore worth writing about.

The highlight of the episode for me was the scene where the patient with Body Dismorphic Disorder took a chainsaw to his ankle because his foot “is not mine.”  Blood everywhere!  For a second I forgot what show I was watching.

Ah, but then I was reminded.  Grey’s Anatomy is the show where the doctors show up for work and then… don’t work. 

When she wasn’t lugging her mother’s ashes around the hospital, Meredith spent most of the episode trying to get staff to volunteer for a pro bono surgery to turn Earless Kid into Earful Kid.  Apparently Earless Kid has a mom who works in the cafeteria who sent her son upstairs to beg for a free surgery.  He got it, too, because he’s cute and everybody’s a sucker for an earless kid.  At the end of the day the kid had new ears but apparently… no parents.  The mom didn't even make an appearance to sign paperwork.  Shouldn’t Earless Kid have been in school anyway?  How did they make those beautiful ears so quickly?  What kind of hospital just takes random kids in and performs same-day major surgery on them without any parental involvement?  And didn’t Meredith have any other patients?  These are questions I had.

George, Izzie, Callie, and seemingly everyone else were dealing with the fallout of George and Izzie’s affair.  Callie was pissed and hurt so she decided to tell everyone that walked into Seattle Grace about it.  Understandable.  Not professional, but understandable.

This episode also marked the return of Ava, or Rebecca, or Jane Doe or whatever her name is.  You know, the once-amnesiac gal whose face was smooshed by a concrete pillar.  Alex fell in love with her back in the third season after giving her a new face and a large forehead.  Rebecca/Ava and Alex spent like, the entire day in an on-call room having sex, and then, after ignoring his pager, Alex went to sleep.

I would totally fire him.

Alex finally was roused from post-coital slumber to find out that Norman the World’s Oldest Intern had a massive stroke.  It’s a good thing that mean ol’ Alex didn’t let Norman go home earlier when he was complaining of not feeling well, because then he wouldn’t have been surrounded by brilliant – if somewhat distracted – surgeons when The Big One hit.

This was Norman’s last episode, but he didn't die, thankfully. He decided surgery was not his bag and he should try psych instead.  Norman did deliver an excellent line to Alex :  “You’re all just a bunch of little children running around with your scalpels and your severed feet and your inappropriate sex in inappropriate places.  You all need a good shrink.”

Amen, brother.  But on the other hand, if the doctors at Seattle Grace were more professional and less libidinous it wouldn’t be very fun, would it?  Nobody tunes in to Grey’s Anatomy to deepen their understanding of the practice of medicine, it’s all about banter and drama and sex and passion.

And, to keep people like me happy, every once in a while they throw in some guy with a chainsaw and a foot that has just got to go. 

--Dave Campbell