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DANCING WITH THE STARS - Latin Night Results

The remaining couples heated up the dance floor on Latin Week with their shimmy-shimmy Salsa routines or their romantic Rumbas.  As usual, The Guchi dominated, unleashing a sultry side we previously haven't seen.  Mrowr!

Here's the rankings for this week:

• Kristi Yamaguchi & Mark Ballas - 29 points
• Jason Taylor and Edyta Sliwinska - 27 points
• Mario & Karina Smirnoff - 27 points
• Marissa Jaret Winokur & Tony Dovoloni  - 24 points
• Shannon Elizabeth & Derek Hough - 23 points
• Cristian de la Fuente & Cheryl Burke - 23 points
• Marlee Matlin & Fabian Sanchez - 22 points
• Priscilla Presley & Louis Van Amstel - 21 points

Tomorrow night at 9PM we'll see which couple gets eliminated on the Results Show.  Join me at the Dancing with the Stars Live Blog for the poorly spelled play-by-play action!

-- Dave Campbell

DANCING WITH THE STARS - Update

Another one bites the dust as the merciless Dancing with the Stars machine ejects Adam Carrola and his partner Julianne Hough from the competition this week.

Adam's elimination was just a matter of time, but he lasted longer than I had thought and I have to give the guy credit for improving and really committing himself to the contest.  He was buoyed by votes from his fans, but sooner or later those low judge's scores were going to drag him down.  The guy has heart, but he just can't compete at the same level as Jason Taylor or The Guchi. 

As we enter this next week of competition, the field of celebrities has been cut down to a core of competitive teams who all have a chance at the Dancing with the Stars Crown of Victory - provided they can get past The Guchi first.

I know, there isn't really a Dancing with the Stars Crown of Victory - but shouldn't there be?

--Dave Campbell

DANCING WITH THE STARS - Live tonight!

  Tonight the dance war rages on! Dancing with the Stars explodes* in your TV set at 8pm with yet another live dance duel, and I'll be blogging about it in real time over at the appropriately named Dancing with the Stars Live Blog.  Stop by and visit, keep me company!

The competition is heating up this week now that the field of contestants has narrowed even further.  On last week's DWTS Results Show, another star fell - America collectively gasped in horror when Tom Bergeron announced that Steve Guttenberg was eliminated!   And across the country, parents had to explain to their upset kids how sometimes life just isn't fair.  The Gutte will be missed.

But the competition grinds on like a dance juggernaut, only looking forward towards victory.  Who will triumph this week?  Who will fail utterly?  Will Yamaguchi retain her impressive lead or will somebody break out of the middle of the pack to challenge her?  Will Samantha Harris' dress be fabulous or not so much?  Will Carrie Ann be totally mean to Marissa again this week?  And how about that Marissa - will she turn it around this week, or dance for the last time? 

Join me tonight at 8PM and we can electronically hang out on my couch and watch.  I'll make popcorn.

--Dave Campbell

*Don't worry, this show won't literally explode in your TV set.  That would be dangerous.
 

DANCING WITH THE STARS - Update!

The battle for dance supremacy is heating up as we enter the next round of this season's Dancing with the Stars competition on Monday, March 31st at 8 PM.  This week our ten remaining contestants will dance the tango or jive - yes, jive.  What does jive even look like?  I don't know, but I guess I'm going to learn Monday night.

BTW, I'll be doing a live color commentary at the Dancing with the Stars Live Blog.  It's an exciting journey into the world of insta-commentary - which in my case means lots of spelling errors, unenlightened commentary and cattiness about what people are wearing.  Come visit!

Since Penn Jillette and Monica Seles were brutally eliminated last week, the field of contestants has been narrowed to ten competetive couples.  Let's take a look at where everyone is currently ranked before the next stage begins, shall we?

Leading the pack are Kristi "The Guchi" Yamaguchi and her partner Mark Ballas with 54 out of 60 points.  As I predicted, The Guchi has utterly dominated on the dance floor - her foxtrot on the first night got a 27 from the judges, which was a Week 1 performance record.  She and Mark scored another 27 for their mambo last week, giving them a total of 54 out of 60 points, and a sizeable lead.  Kristi Yamaguchi is like an unstoppable dance cyborg from the future.

Not far behind The Guchi are R&B star Mario and Katarina Smirnoff, who have a combined score of 50.  The couple scored a 24 for their cha-cha-cha and a 26 for their quickstep, and are clearly a threat to Yamaguchi's supremacy.  Rumours are swirling that the couple are heating up off the dance floor as well, but Mario is denying it.  Did I not say that Mario seemed awfully kissy with Katarina?  I did indeed.

NFL macho man Jason Taylor and his partner Edyta Sliwinska are within striking distance of first place, too.  They currenty hold a combined score of 49, after receiving 22 for their foxtrot and a 27 for their mambo.  Taylor has a certain grace and elegance and he is almost superhumanly handsome - the ladies seem to like him.  With that combination of high scores and lots of votes, Taylor is a definite contender.

The charming Marlee Matlin and her partner Fabian Sanchez are next with a combined score of 46 out of 60.  The deaf Oscar-winning actress scored a 22 for her cha-cha-cha and a 24 for her quickstep.  She's very inspiring - we get lots of comments on the live blog from people who love Marlee.  You have to admire her attitude and her technique for overcoming her deafness and embracing her inner cha-cha-cha.

Next up, actress Shannon Elizabeth and Derek Hough, who make a cute couple.  Ah, but dancers cannot survive on cuteness alone - they scored a 21 for their cha-cha-cha and a 24 for their quickstep.  They're score is trending upwards, but right now they're in the middle of the pack with a combined score of 45.  Lots of potential, though.  I don't know if this helps in her overall score, but Shannon is a dog person.  She helped co-found an animal rescue organization, which makes her pretty cool.  That's worth a few votes, surely.

Priscilla Presley and her partner Louis van Amstel also have a score of 45.  They received a score of 24 for their foxtrot, due in no small part to Priscilla's daring "death spiral" move.  That was something else.  However, the week after they only got a 21 for their mambo - trending in the wrong direction.  They need to focus on Priscilla's strengths and choose more graceful and elegant dances when possible  - I bet they'll tango Monday night.

Behind Priscilla and Louis are Christian de la Fuente and Cheryl Burke, with a surprisingly low 41 points.  I had high hopes for them, but they're off to a slow start.  They got a 21 for their cha-cha-cha and a disappointing 20 for their quickstep.  Judging from the rehearsal footage it looks like Christian has been slack on his training and needs to crank it up a notch. Maybe a bit too cocky?  He needs to get his head in the game.

Marissa Jaret Winokur and her partner Tony Dovolani have a combined score of 39 out of 60, and let's be frank here - that is not an awesome score in anybody's world.  However, the audience loves Marissa (myself included) and her scores are climbing.  The couple got an 18 for their cha-cha-cha and a 21 for their quickstep.  They're heading in the right direction. Tony seems like a really cool guy and a great teacher - it would be a shame if they left this week.

At the bottom of the pack we have Steve Guttenberg aka The Gutte and his partner/taskmaster Anna Trebunskaya.  What they lack in technical skill they make up in charm and Guttenberg's gee-whiz optimism.  They are in last place with a combined score of 34 points after receiving 18 points for their foxtrot and 16 points for their mambo.  I would like The Gutte to stick around because he seems to be having so much fun.

Tying Guttenberg's low score is Adam Carrola and his partner Julianne Hough, who also have 34 points.  Ouch.  Adam's fan base may have kept him from elimination last round, but his dancing's going to have to improve a lot if he wants to survive. 

Who knows, maybe jive is his dance?

Come join me at the Dancing with the Stars Live Blog Monday night, and during Tuesday's results show as well when we see the next couple to dance the Dance of Shame.  It's going to be jivetacular.

--Dave Campbell

DANCING WITH THE STARS - Double elimination!

Tonight is the first Dancing with the Stars results show, where we get to see who doesn't make the cut.  One of the male contestants and one of the female contestants will see their dreams of dance stardom turn into a nightmare of failure.  It's going to be awesome.  Plus!  Musical guest The Jonas Brothers and some Cirque de Soleil craziness.  Plus!  We get to see whether co-host Samantha Harris is wearing a beautiful or not-beautiful dress.  It's 50/50.  As usual, I will be covering the whole thing on the Dancing with the Stars Live Blog.  Drop by and say hello, won't you?

Hey, you know who's NOT going home tonight?

The Guchi.

--Dave Campbell

DANCING WITH THE STARS - Live tonight!

OK, this week we have a two-day Dancing with the Stars live event.  Tonight all twelve contestants  dance their celebrity hearts out!  On Tuesday, dreams of victory turn into "a nightmare of failure" as Tom Bergeron says, when two contestants are sent packing.

Come check out the play-by-play commentary on the Dancing with the Stars Live Blog!  Now!

--Dave Campbell

Dancing with the Stars Live Blog!

Hey!  Come on over to the live Dancing with the Stars blog where I'll be blogging in real time with no net about the show as it happens.  It's the magic of technology, folks.

Tonight - it's Ladies Night, aka Night of the Guchi!  Will Yamaguchi triumph?  Does the sun rise in the morning!

DANCING WITH THE STARS - Day One

OK, it's the first night of Dancing with the Stars 6th season.  Who will win in this struggle for "ultimate ballroom supremacy" as Tom Bergeron calls it?  Well, Kristi Yamaguchi will, duh.  But we won't get to see Kristi until tomorrow night - for tonight we're watching the guys dance.

First we got to see all the pros do their thing in a big opening number.  They're very precise in their movements, aren't they?  They're like incredibly advanced robots who were created just for dancing.  It makes me want to learn ballroom dancing, watching those guys.

First up:  Penn Jillette and Kym Johnson.

This is suspenseful.  What if he falls and crushes her?  Penn is a big dude.  Even Kim says, in her cute Aussie accent:  "Penn is huge, he's enormous, he's a giant."  She doesn't add:  "And I'm in fear for my life."

They did OK!  Penn flopped around a little, but has good stage presence, which goes a long way, but needs more practice.  The flower trick at the end was cute.  Judges gave them 16 out of 30, which is not a disaster.  He did better than I thought he would do, but the guy must have some discipline and work ethic to be as successful as he is.

Next...  Jason Taylor and Edyta Sliwinska

Wow, he did pretty good.  Jason and Edyta danced a foxtrot and the Dolphins' defensive end looked like he really had his act down.  Technically he was everywhere he needed to be and his form and footwork seemed very precise.  However, he seemed a little stiff and there wasn't a lot of emotion or chemistry in their performance.  Bruno noted this and wanted to see more sexy, and I agree.  I think Bruno wants to see more sexy everywhere he goes.  "This 7-11 needs more sexy, more attack!!!"

Jason and Edyta scored a 22 out of 30.  Carrie Ann and Bruno gave them a 7 each, while Len was generous and gave them an 8.  I think Jason Taylor will just get better and more relaxed as the weeks go on - he will be tres formidable.

Next up:  Cristian de la Fuente  and Cheryl Burke

This looks like it could shape up to be a strong team.  Cheryl Burke has won twice on Dancing with the Stars, and Cristian knows that he's in good hands.  They danced the cha-cha, and while Cristian's footwork looked fluid and precise, his upper body was all over the place.  Just watching him next to Cheryl you could really notice how tight and controlled her upper body and arms are compared to Cristian.

The judges noticed too, calling Cristian out on his hunched shoulders.  Carrie Ann seemed a little smitten with the Chilean heart throb, didn't she?  Bruno urged Cristian to "bang just as hard as her."  Oh, Bruno.  You so crazy.

The judges gave Cristian and Cheryl a 21 out of 30.  I thought they did a little better than Jason and Edyta, but what do I know?

Next...  Adam Carolla and Julianne Hough

They've got some work to do.  Carolla looked stiff and somewhat terrified out there, which is understandable since the foxtrot is way out of his frame of reference.  The judges weren't overly impressed either - each of them gave Adam and Julianne a 5, for a total score of 15 out of 30.  Ouch.

I have a feeling we're not going to be seeing a lot of them this season.  Call it a hunch.

Next up...  Mario and Karina Smirnoff

Here's what I learned:  at 21, Mario is the youngest contestant ever to grace the floor on Dancing with the Stars, and his partner Karina had an operation for a herniated something or other in her neck while they were rehearsing.  I half expected her to come out with a neck brace, but she seemed OK.

They did really well!  Mario clearly has some game and the two of them had fantastic chemistry.  I think Mario might have a little crush on Karina - he's awfully kissy, isn't he?  Karina gets points for the prettiest outfit as well. 

The judges really liked them, too.  Mario and Karina scored triple 8s for a 24 out of 30.  Len and Bruno admonished Mario for his footwork, but as a layman I'd say his footwork seemed fine.  This looks like the couple to beat.

And finally... Steve Guttenburg and Anna Trebunskaya

The Guttenburg delivers!  He might not be the best technical dancer among the men, but he's certainly not the worst, and the guy was clearly having a ball.  His foxtrot was a little heavy footed and awkward, but what he lacks in technique he makes up for in charm and showmanship.  The judges were swayed by The Guttenburg's charms as well, giving the couple an 18 out of 30.  I'm rooting for Steve to stick around a little longer - as a matter of fact, I voted for Steve and Anna - because I'm a child of the Eighties and because he brings a sense of joy and fun to the whole thing.  He's in pretty good shape, too!  Go Guttenburg!

OK, tomorrow night it's the ladies' turn.  I'll be back to break it down and to chart the ascendancy of The Guchi.  We'll see if she's the unstoppable force that I think she is...

-Dave Campbell

DANCING WITH THE STARS - Fear The Guchi!

The Guchi is coming, and she will totally crush her opponents.  Mark my words.

If I was one of the other 11 contestants on this season's Dancing with the Stars I would be FREAKING OUT right about now.  How are you going to feel going up against two-time Olympic gold medalist and world champion figure skater Kristi Yamaguchi?  What are your odds, particularly if your name rhymes with Badam Horolla?  I would just pack it in - nobody can touch The Guchi.

Kristi has teamed up with dancer Mark Ballas, who is returning for a second season.  In an interview, Ballas down played Kristi's figure skating experience.  "People would assume that [The Guchi] has a lot of advantages, but actually not," Ballas said.  That's called psychological warfare, right there.  He is just deliberately lying to lull their opponents into a false sense of optimism before they utterly destroy them.

The only couple I'm concerned about this season is Cristian De La Fuente and his partner Cheryl Burke, who is a really strong dancer.  They seem like a formidable pair.  Still, The Guchi will prevail.  She always prevails.

I'm so confident that Yamaguchi is going to win that I've created little pictures of the future champion of Dancing with the Stars.  Feel free to print them out and plaster telephone poles with them.  Spread the word - and the word is GUCHI.

DANCING WITH THE STARS - Five celebrities who will not appear this season

Every season the producers of ABC's hit show Dancing with the Stars consider a wide range of possible celebrity dancers for the show, then narrow it down to just twelve contestants.  This year we here at Live from L.A. got a rare glimpse into the decision making process when we discovered who was not making the final roster, and why.  (If that isn't a set-up for comedy goodness, I don't know what is.  Note to outraged fans and litigious agents:  this is satire, don't hate or sue me.)

Let's take a look:

Dog the Bounty Hunter

Everyone’s favorite mullet-sporting bounty hunter was removed from consideration when he refused to consider removing his trademark utility belt while dancing. The belt, which contains such items as handcuffs, pepper spray, and shark repellent, is a crucial tool in Dog’s never-ending hunt for bail skippers, and he felt that he needed to wear it on the off chance that he happened to see a fugitive in the studio audience while doing the foxtrot. Dancing with the Stars producers were uncomfortable with the ideas of both the utility belt and of him leaping into the crowd to make an arrest, so he didn’t make the cut.  Dog’s aversion to deodorant products may have been a factor as well.

Michal Buffer, the “Let’s get ready to rumble!” guy

An early favorite of Dancing with the Stars producers, professional boxing ring announcer Michael Buffer certainly looks elegant in a tuxedo and has a natural grace and poise. So why wasn’t he selected this season? Apparently Buffer, whose famous catchphrase is a federally registered trademark, has a standard contract that stipulates he calls out “Let’s get ready to ruuuumble!” every sixty seconds of screen time. It was felt this might disrupt the flow of some of the dance numbers and become incredibly annoying as the weeks passed.

I just don't understand their reasoning on this one.

 

Gary Busey

Film actor Gary Busey was rejected from consideration due to the fact that he is Gary Busey.

 

 

Dee Snider

Former lead singer of Eighties metal band Twisted Sister, Dee Snider was a novel choice for this season of Dancing with the Stars. Snider’s agent insisted that he perform every dance number in hideous make-up while wearing his old stage costume, which nixed the deal. Producers were primarily concerned about the safety of Snider’s dance partner, who could be blinded by his unruly locks of frizzy blond hair or crushed by the singer’s platform boots, although there was also some concern about children watching the show being emotionally scarred by the terrifying sight of Snider doing the samba.

 

Barney the Dinosaur

Barney the purple dinosaur was an early choice for producers, but the beloved children’s television star didn’t work out. After some trial runs it was discovered that Barney has a relatively limited range of motion that would prevent him from performing more challenging dance moves and that he just wouldn’t dance unless the music in question had lyrics that included the words “friend,” “love,” or “sharing.”