That’s right people. We’ve risen from the dead (aka The Strike) and we’re back with more chapters about America’s richest family and more importantly: I’m back with this blog. HOORAY! Let me start by telling you the absolute truth – and not because my paycheck depends on it (it does). This season will be bigger and bolder than the first. I mean, the episode starts on a friggin’ yacht, at a party thrown by the Darlings for Nick’s birthday. What’s better than that? If I had a yacht, I would stare out into the deep blue abyss and contemplate life’s most significant questions, such as: why is there Braille on the drive-thru ATM machines? Or why do raw almonds always taste stale? I may never have enough money to buy a yacht and ask myself those questions, but I can tell you a little bit more about this week’s premiere episode. BOOYAH! So let’s get to it.
In “THE BIRTHDAY PRESENT,” we pick up six months after where we left off -- Nick George has accepted his role as the Darling family lawyer and it looks like things have smoothed out with his wife Lisa -- or have they? Last we saw Lisa, she smooched Jeremy Darling, and afterward she said it couldn’t happen again. Did Jeremy listen, or is he just obsessed with the one woman he can’t have?
Patrick Darling reconciles with his father, Tripp, but he’s still lovesick over his transsexual-lover, Carmelita, who went missing at the end of last season. He continues searching for her much to the chagrin of Tripp and Ellen, Patrick’s wife. Will Patrick give up his pursuit and recommit to Ellen, or will he continue and jeopardize his Senate campaign?
Karen Darling is still spying (and sleeping) with Simon Elder. It’s a fact that sleeping with someone is the best way to learn his/her secrets. (Ladies, I’m single.) Is Karen starting to fall for Simon, or is she just using him to get secrets for her daddy, Tripp Darling?
In the last episode, Brian left the church and started to work for the family. His son, Brian Jr. went to live with his mom, Andrea, in Brazil. In this episode they’re back visiting Brian in the Imperial.
This is just a taste of what is going to happen on Wednesday night. I haven’t even mentioned yet that Lucy Liu joined the cast. What does she do? Who cares! She’s Lucy Liu!
This season, I promise to answer all of your questions, so send them in and I’ll answer them in the next week’s blog. And one more thing: someone at the end of this episode gets arrested.
Dave – The Writer’s Assistant
Darling Fact of the Week: Jeremy Darling had a porno tape of Buddy Ebsen doing the nasty.
