A Week of Gynergy

Okay, I’m just gonna throw this out into the webiverse:  My line of work isn’t for the weak.  As an aspiring midwife, I’m often faced with daunting tasks and formidable challenges.  I deal with all kinds of situations.  All kinds of personalities.  All kinds of stereotypes…

That’s right – stereotypes.  Everybody has an opinion.  I get that.  But is it really so hard to believe that a strapping twenty-something is more than capable of performing a simple, little pap smear?  I don’t think so…

This past week was supposed to be my big break.  My big chance to prove to the Oceanside staff that I am going to make a highly skilled, incredibly trustworthy, totally responsible midwife.  It was my big opportunity to fly solo and give patients the best damned pap smears of their lives.  Instead, I got judged.  And stereotyped.  Time and time again.  One day I was a “boy nurse.”  The next day I was “too cute.”  The next day I was “too young.”  They made it impossible to do my job!  People and their freakin’ opinions. 

But, like I said, my job is not for the faint of heart.  There’s no time for intimidation, doubt or fear.  I set out to give happy paps and I was going to give happy paps.  So it took me a few days to tear down the walls and overcome the struggles that us young, male, aspiring midwives grapple with on a constant basis.  There comes a time in each of our lives, however, where we just have to stand up for ourselves.  We have to demand respect, take a deep breath, grab that speculum, and just do it…  Just give our patients happy paps.

Yeah, I rocked it.  I’ll spare you the details but Mrs. Koster definitely got her happy pap.  The most respectful, complete examination of “Lady Town” of her life.  I could tell, Mrs. Koster was satisfied.  And, so was I.

The best part, though, was Naomi standing next to me the whole time.  Now, now, don’t get the wrong impression.  Naomi didn’t help me out at all.  She didn’t need to.  She was just there to witness the birth of a midwife.  She was just there to cap off an extraordinary week of gynergy.  I’m glad she was there.  I actually wanted to celebrate with her, but she soon got a call from her daughter, Maya.  Something was terribly wrong…

It turned out that Maya’s friend, Ruby, was in the hospital for an ectopic pregnancy and gonorrhea.  At only thirteen-years-old.  Worrisome stuff, particularly for Naomi. 

A few days ago, Maya actually went to Addison for help.  And, because of doctor-patient confidentiality, Addison couldn’t tell Naomi.  Well, as Naomi’s friend, Addison could have, but she didn’t…  Let’s just say Naomi was extremely hurt.  Personally, I think Addison was put into a tough position.  I’m just glad it looks like everybody involved is going to be okay…

It was obvious that Addison had something on her mind all week.  Well, I heard she actually had a few things on her mind…  One of them being Pete.  Fantasies or something…  I don’t really want to think about all of that, but Cooper and Sam are convinced that Addison has a little obsession with Pete.  They told that to Pete and he just smiled.  Of course she does, Pete said.  Then he proceeded to show us his bloody hand – it was pretty gnarly.  I guess Pete had to kick some coach’s ass the other day.  This coach was apparently pushing his star athlete way too far.  Nicole Clemmons – she was poised to go to the Olympics, man.  Now, thanks to her obsessive, negligent coach, she’ll never run again.  Yeah, Pete needed to kick his ass.

Oh – speaking of obsessions – Allan came into the practice this week.  You know Allan.  Violet’s Allan?  Well, Violet was thrown for a loop when he showed up.  As a matter of fact, so was Cooper.  He didn’t want to be stuck picking up the pieces after Violet had another breakdown about her ex.  Because it’s happened before.  Many, many times before.  Allan disappears.  Violet gets over him.  Allan shows up.  Violet breaks down.  And, the cycle continues…

I guess Allan was the reason Violet was acting weird all week.  I was actually cleaning up her office one night when her computer screen randomly clicked on and a picture of Bill Clinton popped up.  It was so weird.  There I was, just collecting some patient files from Violet’s desk and the next thing I hear is our national anthem as Bill’s pics start scrolling across her computer screen.  Like I said – weird.

Anyway – I’m off to celebrate.  Happy paps, happy patients, happy Dell.  A week like this deserves a little merriment, don’t you think?  Later! 

Comments

[Montgomery452]

Bring on the merriment! Congrats on your happy pap!! I'm glad you beat out the sterotypes and rocked it! BTW Gynergy is my new favorite word!

[colbertfan]

Aww, you're not ugly, kid. Even if you do have moles in funny places. Congrats on finally doing a "happy pap."

[KateFanUK]

DEll i love your blog!
i love that they are prolonging Addie and Pete really get together. I wonder if they can last it out the whole season then the finale is Addie and Pete at last!! whooooooot

[Betty]

Okey the only thing I could do while reading this was laugh...one word, drama!
But thats why we love this

[LoveyMedTech]

I am so excited for you! It must have been awesome to finally use your skills! I do know how the opinion thing goes. Being in the medical field myself, and being a twenty something I feel your pain of the young, too cute, I can't concentrate because the patient is staring at something they shouldn't be problems. Keep up your persistance and don't let the ladies get the best of you! Happy Paps!

[missdrell83]

Dell, I'm so glad that you got your happy pap! I was worried there for a minute but then Mrs. Koster came through for you! I bet you rocked "Lady Town", that is in a midwifery sort of way.

[LovinIt]

K, word of the day: happy pap! Okay so that's two words, but you get it. Loved you this epi Dell, you rocked!! The words you keep inventing...HI-larious!! Oh yeah, and Cooper is just getting more and more cute me every episode.

happy Dell, happy and merry fans!!

[Sencha]

Well congrats Dell! While most guys in their early 20's have been to "ladytown" they need mapquest to find the 'points of interest'. But not you though-you are a vulva veteran.
Eye candy and brains,determination and spunk, chocolate cake and pap smears,you're a one-stop-shop,dude, and you rock!

[LoveDell]

Dell you are doing such a good job!I was so mad at that stupid multitasker who was on the phone when you were trying to examine her!Please tell me Naomi is not going to be mad at Addison. Maya needs to trust Addi and if Addison told Naomi then Maya may not confide in her again.Last week when you were in Addison's house, what does it look like? And is Shonda or other writers ever going to have a blog maybe they can call it "Private Matter" or something totally different.Not that I don't love your blogs because I do! But I was just wondering. Anyway I love all that you guys are doing.I love Wednesdays!!!!

[abc]

what a great show- love the details and some of the drama... but its not all sex.

[BG3011]

OMG!!This show currently was the best.All I could think about Thursday at school was this show..Anyways im happy you finally gave a happy pap!Best of luck:P

[Deirdre]

Aww Dell, you're the best.

[ide]

we need another show with Dell without a shirt. Pleassssssseeeeeeeee. He is very hot. I love the show is wonderful

[Ashlei]

Congrats man....u did awesome..Oh and I agree with Sencha u are AMAZING!!!!!!!!!

[Ashlei]

Congrats man....u did awesome..Oh and I agree with Sencha u are AMAZING!!!!!!!!!

[Trouble]

Aw Dell, you sweet little mole-plagued cutie. You should keep giving happy paps even though there really is no such thing. Talk to your patients about what's happening on Grey's Anatomy, that'll keep them focused on other things while you are exploring the cave. Whats up with the girl hitting on you when you were about to go "there". She's a freak! Beware of women that get turned on in the middle of GyniLand.

You simply must keep us informed on the office romances especially Addison and Pete. They would be so hot together, bickering and all. Pete can say he's not the marrying kind of guy but the minute Addison starts getting serious with someone else, he'll be on his knees. Addison is the kind of woman that can bring him around to the happy ever after (which doesn't really exist in tv land but happy for a few seasons is possible) Show us the magic Pete and Addi!!

And Coop is so perfect for Vi, why does she not see that? I can't stand Charlotte, why is she there? Is she going to hook up with Pete or Sam because we all know she's there to add to the angst. Maybe you should start flirting with her, she probably could use some love (or at least the most expensive showerhead out there).

Keep us informed Bearer of Moles in Weird Places and we'll keep tuning in. -Trouble with a capital T

[Magyk]

Ohhhhhhhhhh, yes, this show ROX!!!! anyway.... i agree with katiefanuk, and betty up there....and Trouble, you said it!!!! but personally i think Charlotte will like Pete, and Cooper was nice in this one. Keep up the 'drama' dudes....

[Dee]

I love you Dell.

[Dell]

Yeah to all future aspiring midwives, particularly those named Dell! Including myself!

[Sue Martin]

As a Midwife, it's very interesting watching you Dell. When you caught that baby reminded me of my first delivery as a student. If I remember correctly, we were always taught never to turn our backs on a multip and to always have a pair of gloves ready because they can catch you unawares.

For the first few weeks on the Delivery Suite I couldn't do anything, because I'd always have my sterile gloves on almost as soon as I entered the room 'Just in case!!!" Of course I went through several pairs over the course of many long hours.

Inevitably, then the one time I wasn't wearing gloves the vertex was advancing... Rapidly!!!! Hence me catching the baby with gloves half on and half off!!!! Keep up the good work!!!

It's a great show, thoroughly enjoying it!

[Shelby]

Wow, you have some great insight for a young guy... & you're really cute too! ...Too bad Dell's only a character on tv. :(

[Amy]

I say forget Addison and Pete...I want her to get together with that very nice looking police officer! Why didn't she give him her card and ask him to call later?

[grey'sfan]

Hey, Dell....
honestly, if you were the guy giving me my Pap smear, I would be a little skeptic at first, too!
but after seeing how well you did, I wouldn't mind at all now!!!
keep breaking down the barriers, dude!

[LovePeteandDell]

Great blogging - looking forward to new ones soon! And I wish that I had had a happy pap at my last (also first) visit.